


You make life worth living again

by Zombiekiller9879



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Artist Clarke, Bartender Clarke, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Karaoke, Slow Burn, game nights
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-06
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-07-22 00:45:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7411828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zombiekiller9879/pseuds/Zombiekiller9879
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke a struggling wannabe artist/bartender in Polis needs a roommate so she can split the bills. Lexa is returning to Polis after having been away for just over 3 years needs somewhere to stay. Lincoln, Octavia’s boyfriend and Lexa’s brother, suggests to Clarke that she takes Lexa in.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys hope you enjoy this :)
> 
> This chapter is small but since I'm off for the next 2 months or so I should be able to upload regularly as long as I don't get distracted by the surprisingly nice weather in the Uk at the moment

“Raven put some pants on and stop eating my food.”

“But Clarke it’s not my fault the cookies were calling me. They wanted to be eaten I’m only fulfilling their wishes.”

“Whatever Raven just make sure you replace them.”

“Have I ever not paid you back for something?” Raven said seriously.

Clarke raised an eyebrow at Raven and said, “You still haven’t paid me back from last week.”

“Ok so that was one time. “Raven said while rolling her eyes for putting her attention back to the cartoon that was on the TV.

After a busy shift at the bar Grounders that she worked out she wanted nothing else than to go home shower and sleep. Unfortunately for her Raven had other plans one of which being a cookie thief.  She loves Raven but at times she can be a pain in the ass.

This was one of those times.

“Raven I wanna sleep.” Clarke said hoping that Raven would kindly leave her apartment without too much of a fuss.

“You might want to shower before you take a nap. “Raven said with half a cookie still in her mouth.

“Ok firstly don’t talk with your mouth full and secondly I need this job for the rent.”

“Are you really struggling Clarke?” Raven asked genuinely concerned.

Clarke sat on the armchair and sighed, “It’s not great.”

“Why don’t you get a new roommate? I mean you have a spare room since your last roommate disappeared last month without paying their part of the bill.”

“Yeah but I need someone that I can trust and rely on. I’m not going to be taken for a fool again which means I can’t let the first person I meet who needs a place to live here.”

“We’ll find you someone don’t worry. Now go shower and I’ll get O and Lincoln to bring some food over and no complaining I know you didn’t have time to eat earlier plus they miss you.”

Raven watched Clarke leaving the room before entering the bathroom. She was worried about her friend.

 

Lexa quickly checked the address she had written on her arm before knocking on the door. The last thing she wanted was to get the wrong address and wake up someone. She hadn’t seen her brother for three years and wasn’t sure on how he would react to seeing her. Although Lexa was worried she couldn’t afford to hesitate any longer. Taking a deep breath she hesitantly knocked the door in front of her. She never thought she’d be back in Polis after the torment she’d been through all those years ago. Everyone around her had warned her, but she ignored them all and she lost everything because of that.

The house in front of her looked small but comfortable from the outside. The garden was beautiful, colourful flowers sat in the garden making Lexa eager to take a photo of them so she could draw them later.

A few minutes passed and no one had opened the door so Lexa turned around, grabbed her suitcase and made her way down the stone path.

“Hey wait!” Called a voice from behind her.

Lexa turned around slowly to see who had called her. It wasn’t her brother but a young women with brown hair and a slim figure.

“Sorry for waking you I must’ve had the wrong address.” Lexa explained quickly before turning back round.

“If you’re looking for Lincoln this is the right place.” The voice said before Lexa had even taken a single step.

A tear fell from Lexa’s face as she turned round once again but this time she walked up towards the women with a purpose.

“Yeah I’m looking for Lincoln.”

Lexa stood there uncomfortably as the women in front of her studied her.

“My name is Octavia, Lincoln’s girlfriend and I take it you’re Lexa his sister.”

Lexa was surprised by the fact that one this women knew who she was and that she was Lincoln’s girlfriend so she simply nodded at Octavia before adverting her face away from her.

“I-I’m sorry I should go.” Lexa said.

“No don’t go Lexa, listen Lincoln’s just grabbing some food to take to a friend’s place and I was just about to meet him there, you could stay here or come with me if you’d like.” Octavia said trying to get her to stay.

“I’ll stay here and wait I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

Octavia didn’t want Lexa to run off but at the same time she didn’t want her to feel uncomfortable going to something she didn’t even want to go to, “You wouldn’t be intruding but you are welcome to stay here. Now come on in its cold out here.”

 

“Hey Lincoln thanks for coming Clarke will be a sec she’s just getting changed and you know how long that takes her.” Raven said letting the Lincoln into the flat.

“Shut up cookie thief!” Clarke shouted from the other room.

Lincoln chuckled before walking into the kitchen and placing the take-out food on the counter before grabbing some plates.

“Is O not here yet?” Lincoln asked concerned as to why his girlfriend is late. O was neve late for food.

“Geez can’t you guys spend time away from each other.” Raven said before serving herself a large portion of food, “And no clearly O isn’t here since she hasn’t run over from you.”

They decided to sit down and eat so that their food didn’t cold while they waited for Octavia to arrive, they had tried texted her but the got no response; before Lincoln could worry about Octavia not being at the apartment yet the brunette rushed into the flat almost tripping over the rug that was by the door. Once in the apartment O gave Lincoln a quick kiss on the cheek before grabbing her plate of food.

“Ahhh finally O I was worried Raven would eat all your food before you got here.” Clarke said noticing that Raven had been eyeing up Octavia’s plate of food that sat in the microwave waiting to be eaten.

“Hey I wasn’t gonna eat it…”Raven said before stealing a chip from Clarke’s plate.

“The pizza incident last year suggests differently Ray.” Octavia said before digging into her meal.

“Hey that was one time,” Raven said defending herself.

Clarke rolled her eyes before turning back to Octavia, “So how come you’re late?” Clarke asked knowing that Octavia had the day off and basically had no reason to be late.

“Lincoln before I tell you take a breath ok.” Octavia said seriously, “Lexa’s back.”

Clarke and Raven, like Octavia, had never met Lexa but had heard enough stories about her to know that she was a good person who’d been screwed over by life enough times to just give up and run. Lincoln hadn’t told them everything but they knew enough to that Lexa was

Everyone sat in silence waiting for Lincoln to react in anyway. However for a few minutes he sat there showing absolutely no emotion on his face. Octavia, worried for her boyfriend rested a hand on his thigh to show that she was there for him.

“Lincoln you ok?” Octavia asked concerned for Lincoln.

“Yeah, yeah I think I am,” Lincoln said before grinning, “Did she seem good?” Lincoln asked.

“You can see for yourself when we get back home,” Octavia said happy that Lincoln had reacted positively.

“Is it alright if we go now?” Lincoln asked.

“Go Lincoln you need to see your sister I’m gonna go to bed anyway, “Clarke said before yawning not out of boredom but because she hadn’t been sleeping well recently due to her recurring nightmares. Not only was she having nightmares she was also worried about money and her getting a job that wasn’t in a bar. The job at Grounder’s payed enough for her to get by comfortably if she had a roommate but since she didn’t have one she was struggling on a monthly bases. In fact she was struggling so much that her friends would often surprise her with food and other general things like that. She did appreciate everything that they were doing but she didn’t want to rely on her friends until she found a job that payed better or until she found a reliable roommate but the chances of either of those happening was slim.

“Thank you Clarke I’ll see you soon I promise,” Lincoln said before leaving the apartment with Octavia behind him.

Raven left shortly after Octavia and Lincoln and once they did Clarke climbed into bed hoping that she would get some sleep that night.

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got this chapter written a lot quicker than I thought I would so I hope you enjoy this :)
> 
> Thank you for the comments from last chapter I just hope that you enjoy this

Lexa sat alone in the house nervously while she was waiting for her brother and his girlfriend to come back. Looking around she noticed an awful lot of photos sitting on random shelves and on top of the wooden fire place. Lincoln looked happy-happier than she had ever seen him and she knew just by looking at the photos that Octavia must be the reason for that.  In the centre of the fire place sat a group photo of Lincoln, Octavia, another brunette and a beautiful blonde with sky blue eyes at the beach enjoying the sun.  She didn’t know why exactly but the blonde immediately captured her attention. Seeing Lincoln happy and surrounded by friends brought a smile to her face.

Hearing a key turning at the door Lexa straightened her back on the sofa and tried to not look nervous and like she was going to run off at any moment.

“Lexa you here?” Lexa heard Lincoln call out with a shaky voice.

“Yeah I’m still here.” Lexa replied as Lincoln walked into the room, Octavia must’ve gone elsewhere in the small house so that the two could talk privately. She didn’t know how much the girl knew but she clearly didn’t know everything.

Lincoln sat down nervously on the sofa next to Lexa.

Silence filled the room. Much needed to be said but nobody seemed to know where to start. Minutes passed and not a single word was said.

“You left. “Lincoln whispered.

“Lincoln I’m-“Lexa rushed to say.

“You’re sorry I know but you just vanished without a word. I know you were upset but we all needed you.” Lincoln said in a harsh tone.

“I just found out Costia was cheating on me with Nia of all people and then-“Lexa said before breaking down in tears. Her brother wrapped his arms around her as she wept into his shoulder.

Everything that Lexa had kept inside came out all at once. It overwhelmed her as Lincoln continued to hold her tightly in his arms afraid that if he let go she would leave again but she knew that as soon as she saw her brother she would never leave again even if things got difficult.

“Shh it’s alright Lexa you’re back now which means we can all help you.” Lincoln said comforting Lexa ever so slightly.

“I never should have left not when everything I needed was in this room,” Lexa said looking into Lincolns eyes.

“You’re welcome to stay here Lexa but it won’t be comfortable sleeping on the sofa,” Lincoln said knowing that Lexa was tired and that they could talk more tomorrow.

“It’s better than the floor,” Lexa said remembering the nights she slept under bridges when she had no money. For the last three years Lexa had worked in cheap diners and bars and staying at hostels never staying in one place for too long so for her a sofa in her brother’s home was perfect for her.

Lincoln grabbed Lexa a couple of blankets so she would be a little bit comfortable.

After Lincoln had said goodnight Lexa wrapped the blankets around her almost as tightly as when Lincoln had been holding her. As she drifted off to sleep she hoped she didn’t get a nightmare and thanked whatever god that was out there that she met Abby Griffin who helped her find her way home after she almost died.

 

When Clarke woke early in the morning after a restless night she never felt so alone. She had her friends but she didn’t have that special someone that could comfort her when she was at her worse or smile at her like she was their whole world. When her father died it broke her and she hasn’t ever gotten over the pain.

Clarke slowly got out of bed to make herself a quick breakfast with a strong cup of coffee. While reading the job section of the paper, like she would usually do to see if there were any decent jobs going, she noticed that Polis art gallery was hiring. It didn’t say what the job would entail but Clarke was interested. Very interested. This was her chance to do something that she loved and show her mother that dropping out of med school to peruse art was a good decision.

The only problem was that the due date for the application was in months’ time. That wouldn’t be a problem if all she had to do was drop off her CV and hope that they asked her for back for an interview but in this case it was a problem because they were requiring the applicants to show them at least five pieces of original work to prove they knew something about art.

“Shit,” Clarke cursed out loud for nobody to hear.

Recently Clarke hadn’t been able to do any art not only because she didn’t have time but because she hadn’t found her muse. She had nothing to inspire her. Her old work was mainly at her mother’s house and she did not want to go back there under any circumstances.  She would just have to find something to inspire her. She had a month to change her life and make life worth living again or she’d continue pulling pints for the rest of her miserable life.

Clarke had to get to work for seven that evening which meant she had till about six to tidy the apartment for tomorrow’s game night.

Game night happened every two weeks on a Saturday night. They would play anything from Mario kart to scrabble. They were all highly competitive which made every game they played interesting. At the end of the year they would crown the winner of whoever won the most games that year. Last year Raven won because before every game night she would practise Mario kart since that was their favourite game to play as it was difficult to cheat in. As Raven won last year she would get all bragging rights for the year. The one game they would never play was monopoly after an incident that left Octavia with a broken bowl.

Clarke did a quick dust round and hoovered the carpet before making sure all of the consoles were set up properly. She didn’t own any of the consoles but before game night they all get dropped off at the host’s house to save time. She loved game night as it was a chance to see all of her friends at once. Sometimes when they drank too much they would have to sleep over but that wasn’t a problem most of the time.

Lincoln would be bringing all of the food for the night and it was Raven’s turn to bring the alcohol. The reason they took turns doing everything was because it would start to get expensive otherwise.

 

When Lexa woke up she was disorientated. Not knowing where she was she started to hyperventilate and shake uncontrollably.

Now struggling to breathe Lexa sat up and searched for something in the room to ground her and stop her panic attack. 

A flash of golden hair caught her attention in one of the pictures on the fire place.  Lexa slowly rose from the sofa to get a closer look at the photo. That’s when she remembered that it’s the photo she was staring at the day before the one where Lincoln and his friends were at the beach. For some reason she started to calm down slightly. Her chest was still painful and felt heavy within her but she was breathing a lot better. Lexa silently thanked the blonde for stopping her panic attack from getting any worse. She stood there for a few moments while she fully caught her breath back.

“That’s me Clarke and Raven at the beach with Lincoln last year,” Octavia said from behind her walking towards Lexa.

Lexa wanted to ask which one was Clarke but luckily she didn’t have to because Octavia quickly informed her without asking that Clarke the beautiful blonde and Raven was the attractive brunette smiling brightly next to Clarke who had an equally big smile.

“You make him happy,” Lexa said to Octavia, “I’m glad.”

“He make me happy as well. I love him more than anything in this world.” Octavia said sincerely.

“I probably have no right to say this but if you hurt him I’ll hurt you.” Lexa said looking at Octavia with a small smile.

“Don’t worry Anya’s already made that threat but don’t worry I’ll never hurt him just like he would never hurt me intentionally.” Octavia said returning Lexa’s smile.

Hearing Anya’s name brought back lots of both wonderful and crappy memories. Anya had been her and Lincoln’s best friend for as long as she could remember. She was there for Lexa when she came out to her parents at the age of sixteen.  She was there when she was beaten to a pulp by the school bullies who thought she was disgusting and didn’t deserve to live.

“Fuck Anya I need to see her,” Lexa said before sitting on the edge of the sofa,” She’s gonna kill me.” Lexa said putting her face in her hands.

Feeling a hand rest on her back she looked up at Octavia.

“Yeah she probably will kill you but she’ll also be glad that you’re alive and not dying in a ditch like everyone thought you had been for the last few years.” Octavia said reassuring Lexa slightly that things can and will improve in time.

“I’ve messed everything up. I have nothing.” Tears filled Lexa’s eyes as she spoke.

“That’s not true.”

Lexa looked up at Octavia confused.

“You have Lincoln and you have me and soon you’ll have Anya again and I’m completely certain that Clarke and Raven will be there for you soon as well once you meet them.”

Lexa’s heart filled with hope when hearing those words but at the same time it scared her. She also felt like she didn’t deserve them.

“I don’t deserve anyone I don’t deserve your kindness.” Lexa said heading for the door quickly.

“Yes you do Lexa.” Lincoln said overhearing Lexa.

“But why? Why do I?” Lexa questioned as tears streamed down her face. She was now annoyed with herself for showing so much emotion in front of people but after hiding it for so long it all just came out and there was no stopping it. Her walls had been broken.

“You deserve it because you are a good person. You’re the one who was there for me when I broke my arm in that accident at Mount Weather. You’re the one who was there for me whenever I needed you.” Lincoln said desperately.

“But I wasn’t there for you when you needed me the most.” Lexa said raising her voice.

“You’re here now.” Lincoln said not caring about the past but the fact that her sister was finally back after so much time.

Lexa crumbled to the ground and sat with her back to the wall holding her knees shaking.

“I-I don’t know what to do.”

“Live Lexa,” Lincoln said falling to the floor beside her.

After a few minutes of silence Lexa spoke softly to Lincoln, “I don’t know how.”

“We’ll show you how Lex. “Lincoln said before helping Lexa up, “Lets go make some pancakes.”

 

 **To Octavia from Clarke:** Hey O just wanted to check in and see how things went last night with Lexa.

 

 **To Clarke from Octavia:** Things went as well as expected but the main thing is that she’s staying for good.

 

 **To Octavia from Clarke:** Lincoln must be glad

 

 **To Clarke from Octavia:** I haven’t seen him this happy and nervous since we first started dating. I was thinking that Lexa could come to game night tomorrow.

 

 **To Octavia from Clarke:** I think that’s a great idea at least that way she’ll know people are there for her.

 

 **To Clarke from Octavia:** That’s exactly what I was thinking

 

Clarke continued to talk to Octavia for little while longer before getting ready for her shift at Grounder’s. It was going to be busy since it was which meant she would be on her feet the majority of the night. She hated Friday’s because it meant that Finn would be working that night alongside her, luckily for her Anya (who owned the bar) would make sure that Finn stayed away from her and actually did some work. Finn had one more warning before he would be fired and knowing Anya both as a friend and her boss Anya never made idol threats.

The uniform for the bar was simply black skinny trousers and a black top to match. It didn’t take her long to get ready and luckily for her she lived about ten or so minutes away from the bar which meant she didn’t need to leave till fifteen minutes before her shift began.

Once she arrived to the bar she said a quick hello to Anya before making sure everything was prepped for the night.

Or at least she was trying to.

While Clarke was trying to work when all she had was Finn trying to get her to go on a date with him but she didn’t want to go on a date with him. However he wouldn’t listen to her. Every time she said no he would only try harder.  Eventually when customers started forming a que at the bar Finn left her alone and got to work like he should’ve been doing. He was an alright bartender but he wasn’t as good as Clarke.

Clarke was busy listening to a customer give their order when she saw in the corner of her eyes Finn slip some money into the pockets of his jeans. For the last couple of weeks she had noticed that money had been going missing and now she’d just seen the culprit in action. After finishing up the order she quickly walked towards Anya’s office to inform her of Finn’s wrongdoing. Luckily for her there wasn’t anyone at that moment ordering any drinks which meant she could do this now rather than later.

Once she reached the office she knocked quickly.

“Come in.” She heard Anya call from the inside. She sounded stressed.

Clarke opened the door and walked in slowly.

“Do you need be to come help out there Clarke?” Anya said pushing the conversation forward.

“No no it’s not that it’s just I know who’ve been stealing the money.” Clarke said almost running out of breath. Only she and Clarke knew that there was money going missing.

Anya stood up from the desk that she was doing paper work from before pacing, “So who is it don’t leave me hanging here.” Anya felt relieved that they would finally be able to put this behind them so that she could focus on improving the bar. When Lexa left without a word Anya brought a bar that was falling apart and aimed to back it better. Now three years later business was booming. Clarke was the first person she interviewed and she gave her the job by the end of the day after having interviewed some awful people.  Clarke may have just turned twenty one a few weeks before but she was the best person who had turned up that day.  It didn’t take long for the two to become friends and it didn’t take long for two groups of friends to merge into one group. Lincoln fell in love with Octavia as soon as she walked into the bar with Raven to support Clarke on her first shift and found new friendships with people she never thought she would get along with

“It’s Finn.”

“I’m gonna enjoy firing him. Anya said with a wicked smile, “Could you kindly ask him to come here please Clarke? I’ll come out and help for the rest of the night after I’m done with him”

“Yeah of course I’ll just get back to work.” Clarke said suddenly feeling guilty that if she does get her act together with her art she won’t be working here anymore and Anya would have to fill not just one but two bartender jobs at the same time.

Clarke walked round the corner to find Finn chatting up some girls as he’d usually do.

“Hey Finn Anya wants you for a sec I can take over.” Clarke said walking behind the bar.

“Ladies I’ll be back in a sec,” Finn said before walking towards the office.

Clarke had just finished dealing with another customer when Finn walked angrily out of the office sending a glare at Clarke before slamming the door on the way out.

“That went well.” Anya said to Clarke once she got to the bar.

“Could’ve been a lot worse I suppose. “Clarke said seriously. At least Finn left without doing anything stupid like destroying the place.

“Yeah it could’ve, you hosting game night tomorrow?” Anya asked while pouring a customer a couple of shots.

“Yeah it is.” Clarke said trying to hide her nerves since she was unsure whether or not to tell her about Lexa. Clarke quickly decided to let Lincoln to tell her as it she would be overstepping as she hadn’t even met Lexa yet. She had seen photos of the green eyed brunette and heard stories about her but she could be a completely different person from what she has heard.

“Great I look forward to it.”

 

Lexa was tired after a day of baking with Lincoln. Apparently when hey go to game nights they take turns doing the food and this time it was Lincolns turn. Octavia left around midday to go to work leaving the two siblings alone.  

They made some delicious looking cupcakes and some biscuits as well as a pasta salad. Not only that but Lincoln ran down to the store to buy a few packets of crisps and some skittles so they could snack on things while they were playing.

It was a fun day filled with silly jokes and singing competitions that Lexa won without trying. It felt normal as if no time had passed.

She knew that she couldn’t stay here for too long since the place was small with only one bedroom and a single bathroom but for now it would do.

As Lexa drifted off to sleep she dreamt of blue eyes and golden hair.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment and let me know what you think of this
> 
> Clarke and Lexa will meet in the next chapter :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you go another chapter so I hope you like it :)
> 
> Thank you so much for all of your comments I hope that we can all continue this hopefully long mess of a story for a while
> 
> I didn't have time to proof read cause wow it's late

Lexa woke up slowly with yawning as she sat up before stretching.  For the first night in many she didn’t have a nightmare. Normally she would wake up one or more times a night but for some unknown reason she wasn’t disturbed by her nightmare. _Maybe they will stop or at the very least become less frequent_ Lexa thought to herself while getting up to make herself a coffee she knew that it was wishful thinking for her nightmares to stop but she may as well enjoy it for as long as it lasted. Lexa just hoped that it wasn’t a onetime occurrence.

After she was done making her coffee sitting back down on the sofa. Looking up at the picture on the fireplace she suddenly became nervous about meeting Lincoln’s friends. She knew nothing about them but they probably knew things about her especially since Octavia recognized her straight away.  It was all happening so quickly. She had only just returned home Polis and she was going to be meeting new people. All Lexa wanted was for things to go back to what they were like. For example on a Saturday night she would be taking Costia for a date. _Fuck don’t think about her._ Instead of sitting on the sofa moping around thinking about the good times, she decided to be productive. Getting up from the sofa Lexa walked into the kitchen gathering the ingredients needed to make Lincoln’s favourite breakfast. After Lincoln went on a school trip to England he fell in love with a classic English breakfast which is why Lexa decided to make him and Octavia one now.

The smell of bacon filled the small house luring the couple upstairs to get out of bed and venture downstairs.

Cooking was something that Lexa enjoyed doing so she often made everyone breakfast on a Saturday before everyone went out to do whatever they needed to do that particular day. Quite often Anya would come over and eat whatever Lexa fancied making that day. For years this was their weekly routine. When they went to college Lexa was lucky enough to be going to the same one as her brother and Anya. In college Lexa and Anya both studied business after her and Anya had a conversation about starting a business together. Lincoln wanted to be an Art teacher.  

“Hey Lex you didn’t have to make breakfast for us, “Lincoln said as Lexa plated the food up for all of them before setting it down on the kitchen table so that they could sit together and eat.

Lexa shook her head smiling slightly and said, “I know I didn’t but I wanted to.” She wanted to make them breakfast as a way of saying thank you as well.

While hugging Lexa Lincoln thanked her for the meal. Octavia did the same but instead of a hug she smiled at her and promised that she would tidy up so that Lexa didn’t have to.

“So are you looking forward to this evening?” Octavia asked Lexa.

“Truthfully I’m really nervous and quite scared.” Lexa said before taking a bite of her food.

“It’ll be fun. We’ll sit and play games, you can get to know the others as well.” Octavia said with excitement in her voice.

“What if they don’t like me?” Lexa asked in a small voice. The last time she had properly hanged out with people was a few months before she left. Now that she was back she would be hanging out with people that are friends with her brother but it doesn’t mean that they would ever be friends with her.

“Lexa they’ll love especially if you ever get the chance to make a breakfast like this for them.” Octavia said practically moaning at the taste of the food.

Lincoln had almost finished his meal before finally contributing to the conversation after noticing that Lexa was still worried even after Octavia’s attempts at reassuring Lexa that everything would go smoothly.

“Lexa if you’re not ready for this you can always try another night. “Lincoln said to give Lexa another option.

Lexa sat there a few moments deciding on what she would do. A fight was going on within her. One side was suggesting to wait until she’s adjusted to living in Polis and the other side saying that it would be better to get it over and done with. A few minutes later she gave Octavia and Lincoln her answer.

 

It was ten minutes before everyone had to arrive and Clarke still hadn’t gotten dressed. To be fair the new season of Orange is the new black was just realised so Clarke did the best thing that she could possibly do that day. Binge. And now with ten minutes to go before her friends arrived Clarke was now where near ready.

Quickly turning off her Netflix, Clarke ran into her room to throw on some sweatpants and a tank top not caring about what her friends saw her in.

Hearing some obnoxious banging on the door Clarke ran out of her room banging her arm against the door frame, “Just coming!” Shouted Clarke.

Once Clarke reached the door she took a deep breath preparing herself for the madness she was about to embrace.  As soon as the door opened Raven and Anya walked into the room carrying a ridiculous amount of alcohol and fizzy drinks.

“Finally Clarke I thought I would have to pick the lock again.” Raven said as she walked into the kitchen dumping the drinks on the counter top.

“Raven I swear to whatever god out there that if you pick my lock again you won’t be allowed back in.” Clarke said slightly annoyed,” Hey Anya long time no see.”

“Clarke you know I’d never pick your lock.” Raven said smirking before winking at Clarke.

“What do you-oh! Seriously Rae get your head out of the gutter.” Clarke said laughing at Raven.

Anya went and sat on the sofa securing herself the best seat.

“But Clarke I was born the gutter I can’t leave my roots.” Raven said pretending to be hurt.

“Raven shut up and sit down please.” Anya said annoyed at Raven’s antics.

“Fine but only if we start with Mario Kart I wanna try a new move I’ve working on. “Raven said sitting down closely next to Anya.

Clarke went into the kitchen laughing at her two friends. _This is gonna be fun tonight._

When Octavia and Lincoln got there Lincoln must have knocked as the knocking wasn’t continuous.

“Anya can you get the door?” Clarke asked as she made everyone some drinks.

Anya groaned as Raven stole her seat as soon as she got up from the sofa. “Dammit Rae you better get your ass back to where you were when I get back.”

“Just keeping it warm for you.”

 

Lexa, Lincoln and Octavia waited patiently outside Clarke’s apartment while they waited for someone to open the door. Nerves threated to come back up as they waited and Lexa was having second thoughts. But before those thoughts fully developed the door opened to show Anya. Her best friend. Who she left.

Anya’s face went through a wave of emotions from happiness to surprise to then settle on anger. In fact Anya was so angry without even making it obvious of what she was going to do she slapped Lexa right in the face. Lexa’s face stung hard but she was more hurt that it was from her friend but at the same time she felt like it was completely deserved. Normally if someone hit her she would retaliate but she just couldn’t instead she down towards the ground. Lincoln and Octavia just gasped in surprise but then quickly remembered that no one had warned Anya which meant that Anya couldn’t prepare for the reunion.

Anya looked at Lexa shocked as if she had just realized what she did.

“Fuck Lexa.” Anya said almost apologetically. Almost.

“Maybe I should just go.” Lexa said turning around to hide her eyes that were threatening to let loose the tidal wave of tears.

“No you are not leaving not again.” Anya said firmly grabbing Lexa spinning her back around, “Just come inside get some ice from Clarke and then we can talk.”

Lexa nodded in response and was finally let into the apartment. Lexa quickly found herself walking on auto pilot towards the kitchen that was adjacent to the main room. As Lexa was still walking with her head down low almost as if she were hiding her face she managed to walk into something solid before falling down to the ground on top of it.

The object grunted in pain. _Wait objects don’t make sounds…_

“Are you gonna get up or fall asleep on me or kindly get up?” A voice groaned from below her.

Lexa looked up and gazed into the bluest eyes around that put the sky to shame. Once realizing that she was in fact lying directly on top of someone she quickly got up off the person before helping them up off the ground. Feeling embarrassed Lexa stood there adverting her eyes from them scared.

“Are you gonna talk or what?” The voice said.

This time Lexa looked and quickly knew who it was that she fell on. It was Clarke. The Clarke who indirectly saved her from having a really bad panic attack. Although at this particular moment Lexa felt another one coming along. Breathing heavily Lexa put a hand to a chest and tried to breathe slowly but she just couldn’t do it.

 

Out in the living area unaware of what was going on in the kitchen everyone sat round the sofas awkwardly. Lincoln had just finished placing the food on the table when Raven spoke,“ Ok fuck it what the hell happened out there?” Raven said hating the silence.

“Anya slapped Lexa.” Lincoln said harshly.

“You know what guys. She deserved it. She left us Lincoln when we needed her and then she comes back out of the blue and you don’t have the audacity to not tell me.” Anya said shaking in her seat clenching her jaw.

“I’m sorry I forgot to tell you Anya,” Lincoln said changing his tone, “but I was enjoying having my sister back.

“Yeah I get that I’m just annoyed and very surprised.”

 

 

After being squished by an insanely hot girl who just happened to be Lincoln sister she was slightly confused and a bit bruised from the floor. When Clarke noticed Lexa’s breathing becoming more and more rapid she got a bit closer to the women and took her right hand in hers and placed it on her heart.

“Ok Lexa I want you to try and breathe with me.” Clarke said knowing that panic attacks are scary and having someone ground you is really helpful.

Lexa gripped onto Clarke’s hand like a lifeline and slowly started to breathe in time with her. Worried that she was too close Lexa stood back before apologising, “Sorry about that I-I don’t know what happened.”

“Hey it’s all good accidents happen.” Clarke said laughing slightly.

Lexa laughed slightly as well, “Do you have ice?”

“Yeah did you hurt yourself when we fell?” Clarke asked while looking up and down Lexa’s slim body for signs or well just about anything. Lexa was wearing tight black skinny jeans that looked to be painted on with a black top and leather jacket that she really wanted have now that she’d seen it.

“Nope but Anya slapped me pretty hard.” Lexa said suddenly feeling the pain of the slap again.

“Damn that must’ve hurt.” Clarke said while checking the freezer for ice. Once she found it she handed it over to Lexa,” Here you go one bag of ice.”

“Thanks Clarke.” Lexa said trying her name out for the first time.

“How did you know my name?” Clarke asked with an eyebrow raised slightly.

“How did you know mine?” Lexa replied also raising her eyebrow.

“Lincoln told me.” Clarke said happy that Lexa seemed like the cool person people said she was before the whole disappearing happened,” Who told you?

“Octavia did when she saw me looking at a photo of you guys at the beach.” Lexa said honestly.

“Yeah I know the one you’re on about. Would you like a drink?” Clarke asked.

“Could I just have a lemonade?” Lexa asked while holding the ice pack up to her face. Lexa hadn’t had a drop of alcohol for years not since that terrible night.

“Yeah I’ll just pour you one.”

While Clarke was pouring Lexa’s glass Rave popped her head round the corner,” Hey did you guys forget about us or something?”

“Like I could ever forget you Rae.” Clarke replied.

“Aww princess you break my heart,” Raven said placing her hand on her heart,” Now hurry up I wanna beat your ass.” Raven said walking off with the drinks Clarke made earlier.

 

Once done in the kitchen Lexa and Clarke walked back into the living room. Clarke’s flat while small seemed welcoming. The painting on the wall was absolutely magnificent and went perfectly with the room. All of the furniture didn’t quite match but that just made the place unique unlike the boring catalogue rooms everyone has these days. Sometime random stuff fit perfectly.

Lexa guessed that the whole apartment was like this because in the kitchen all of the appliances were multi coloured and to Lexa that was pure awesomeness. Lexa loved everything about the place and was a bit jealous that she didn’t have it.

 Lexa was expecting a confrontation but what she wasn’t expecting was Anya offering her a job. She noticed Clarke sit down and grab a cupcake in the front of her before turning her attention back to Anya

“Look Lex I’m tiny bit sorry for earlier but in fairness I was not expecting you.” Anya said guiltily.

“It’s fine Anya let’s just leave it for tonight.” Lexa said not feeling like a deep conversation that evening.  The last couple of days had been stressful and Lexa just wanted to play some games. Although she would be rusty Lexa believed that she still had a strong chance of winning against everyone. From what Octavia told her earlier everyone took this very seriously which was a good thing because it made winning that whole lot sweeter.

“Yeah alright but I do want to say this one you can start your job working with me at the bar and two I am glad that you came home.” Anya said pulling Lexa into a tight hug,” but if you leave again you are so dead Woods.” Anya said releasing Lexa.

“Are you serious Anya?” Lexa said shocked. She had no idea that Anya now owned a bar. A business. On her own. Lexa was definitely impressed.

“About what the job or me killing you?” Anya replied.

“The job An.” Lexa said rolling her eyes rather dramatically.

“I’m deadly serious Lex. Now sit down so I can kick your ass.” Anya said before sliding in next to Raven on the sofa.

Lexa looked around at where to sit and saw that the only seat left available was next to Clarke which Lexa didn’t mind because she women had been kind to her in the kitchen. Plus it gave her a chance to talk to her more and Lexa definitely didn’t mind that either. Lexa kept the ice pack on her face for another five or so minuets while everyone was arguing about what player they were going to be in Mario Kart. Since there were six of them two of them had to sit out so Lexa nominated herself as did Lincoln. That meant that Lexa could surprise Clarke and Raven later at her amazing skills. Before the first match started Lexa put the ice pack in the freezer so it wouldn’t get in the way later. She knew her face would be sore but there wasn’t a great deal she could do.

It was hilarious watching the four friends play Mario Kart seriously as if their life depended on it. To Lexa this was one of the best nights in years and she could see herself becoming friends with Clarke and Raven.

Clarke kept a steady first place in the first and second round but Raven hit her with a red shell before grabbing a bomb and blowing Clarke up leaving her in last place and Raven in first.

“Yes I love you bombs. Now if you guys let me blow stuff up in real life that would just be great.” Raven said happily as she drove past Clarke.

“No!” Everyone replied instantly except Lexa as they knew that Raven would end up killing someone else, herself or an entire buildings worth of people.

While Raven was busy arguing about blowing things up Clarke had managed to get a blue shell at the beginning of the last round. Clarke used it instantly getting both Raven and Octavia out of the way at the same time because Octavia was too close to Raven.

“What the hell!” Raven and Octavia said loudly clearly confused about what had just happened.

Anya had managed to sneak into first place with Clarke trailing closely behind.

“Looks like I win Princess.” Anya smugly said.

“Not to fast An.” Clarke said before releasing red shell at Anya,” Boom and another win in the bag.” Clarke said standing up and bowing and then eating a cookie because winning made you hungry.

“Nice one Clarke I haven’t seen Anya lose like that for ages.” Lexa said smiling at Clarke, “but I’m afraid that you will now lose to me.”

“Oh will I now?” Clarke asked, “Cause I’ve never seen you played before.”

“Exactly you’ve never seen me play. I dib Yoshi.” Lexa said before Lincoln could get a word in.

“Dammit Lex I wanted Yoshi.” Lincoln said annoyed. For years as children they would argue over who got that character and for some reason Lexa always won.

“I’ll be lugi again.” Anya said while picking Rainbow road knowing that Lexa could kick some serious butt of this map. Anya knew that she and Lincoln would lose this round but if it meant Clarke losing after the stunt she just pulled it would be worth it.

“Damn you sure about this map?” Clarke asked. Everyone knew that this was the hardest map so why would she pick it…

Five minutes later and a bucket load of profanity later from Clarke the level was over. Lexa came first with Anya second, Lincoln third and Clarke in last.

Everyone but Anya and Lincoln was speechless. Raven kept on trying to speak but just couldn’t which made her look a bit like a fish.

Clarke spoke first breaking the silence,” Welcome to the group Lex.”

For the first time in years Lexa felt accepted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual let me know what you think and give me ideas of what you think will happen next
> 
> Lincoln and Clarke will talk next chapter about living arrangements :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been over a week with no updates but I had crappy family stuff than a couple of parties. Plus the fact that it's been great weather in the UK due to the heatwave that I've been enjoying to the fullest. 
> 
> Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter and hopefully the next one will be soonish!

“Holy shit Lexa I never thought you’d beat Raven at Call of Duty!” Octavia exclaimed in disbelief.

“It was a fluke come on I want another re-match.” Raven said not believing that she lost against Lexa three times.

“No no more re-matches Raven you lost so you’ll have to wait till next game night. If-if Lexa wants to come again. “Clarke said unsure of whether or not she had said something wrong. She wanted Lexa to come back again. She wanted Lexa to be her friend and to be friends with the others. Clarke could see Lexa fitting into the group and being the missing puzzle piece.

“I wouldn’t dream of missing it.” Lexa said delighted that she was wanted back. The evening was beyond amazing. They played games well into the night, everyone having their chance at glory. “I’ll see you tomorrow at work Clarke.” Lexa said happy that she would be seeing Clarke again very soon. The two had mini private conversations getting to know each other a bit while everyone else was arguing either about what game they should play next or teasing someone when they lost.

Everyone said goodnight all tired from one of the best game nights for a while (it even beat the night of the free pizzas).

 

Lincoln got into bed next to Octavia cuddling into her as if he were protecting her from an unknown danger. Or maybe it was because he was slightly cold. Whatever the reason Lincoln was happy holding Octavia after the long day that they had. Although it was an absolutely fantastic day they were thoroughly exhausted.

“Octavia I wanted to run something by you before I intervene.” Lincoln said nervously while fiddling with the bed covers.

“Sure what is it?” Octavia said turning round so that she could see her boyfriend.

“Clarke needs a roommate.” Lincoln started,” Lexa needs somewhere more comfy to stay…” Lincoln said hoping that Octavia could see where this was heading.

“And you think they should live together.” Octavia said to Lincoln.

Lincoln nodded, “They got on well this evening so I think Clarke would be up for this. I’m just not sure how Lexa would react.”

Lincoln still thought that Lexa is a flight risk so asking Clarke to ask Lexa to move in would be overstepping some boundaries but it would also help Lexa out so much. Lincoln would be going back to work soon as would Octavia which meant they wouldn’t be able to drive Lexa to work leaving her with the choice of walking for an hour both ways or getting the stinky bus which was also very expensive.

“I think that as long as she understands that Clarke would definitely want Lexa, Lexa wouldn’t have a problem with it.” Octavia said proud that she was giving useful advice to someone.

“Ok I’ll talk to Clarke tomorrow then.”

 

Clarke rose slowly out the bed. Later today she’d have work but until then she was going to paint something. Anything. If she got this job she just knew that she would finally have the guts to go back to her mum. Her mother didn’t support her but if Clarke could show her mum that she can survive as an artist than perhaps their relationship could be salvaged and especially since it’d soon be her dad’s birthday. Last year her and her mum got into an argument because she was still working at a bar.

This year could be worse though because now she had no roommate which meant she might have to find a new smaller apartment. Basically she’d taking a huge step back in life. However there was another possibility. Lexa, Lincoln’s mysterious sister, is back after her three year disappearance and would probably need somewhere better to stay soon as Lincolns sofa wouldn’t do in the long term. Clarke shook her head thinking it was a ridiculous idea that would never take flight.  

After making a pot of coffee to keep her going for a while she gathered everything from around her room that she would need to paint. Clarke stared at the blank canvas trying to think of something to paint. She was about to give up in frustration but in the corner of her eye she saw green.

Soon minutes passed and then a couple of hours and Clarke had managed to paint an eye. Within the eye was a forest filled with different shades of green. She didn’t know why she painted this particular painting but she was glad. Smiling brightly Clarke took a picture of it on snapchat to send to her friends.

Instantly her friends texting her back asking where she got the inspiration.

Clarke didn’t know how she got out of her artists block but she was beyond happy that she had and now all she wanted to do was paint and see what she would do next.

Before Clarke had the chance to tidy up she heard a knock on the door. Clarke, not caring that she had green paint on her face, walked up to the door to unlock it she was also confused as to who it was because as far as she knew nobody was coming over that day.

“Hey Clarke.” Lincoln said as Clarke opened the door.

“Hey Lincoln.” Clarke said, “Come in.”

Knowing that Lincoln would want a tea Clarke quickly went to the kitchen to grab one for him.  Coming back into the main room she found Lincoln admiring her painting.

“This is amazing Clarke.” Lincoln said hearing Clarke walk back into the room.

“Thank you I painted it today.” Clarke said sitting down on the sofa.

Lincoln sat down on the sofa next to Clarke suddenly nervous about what he was to ask her he started fiddling with his shirt.

Clarke knowing that Lincoln was nervous because he did the same thing when he asked Clarke advice on how to ask Octavia to move in with him.

“Lincoln is there something wrong?” Clarke hesitantly asked.

“What no nothing’s wrong I just need to ask you something.” Lincoln quickly said before taking a breath and continuing, “You need a roommate.” Clarke nodded. “Right so Lexa needs somewhere more permanent to stay and since she’ll be working at the bar you’ll know that she has a job and be able to pay her way here and so I was wondering if you’d ask her to move in.” Lincoln rambled on.

“Lincoln I’d be happy to ask her, honestly earlier I was thinking about asking her to live here. She seems like a nice person and I think we’d get on.” Clarke said honestly.

“That’s great Clarke.” Lincoln said beaming at Clarke,” Thank you.”

“No need to thank me honestly she’d be doing me a favour as well.

 

 

Lexa was informed earlier via text from Anya that she would have to go to work early so that she could be shown where everything was.

When she arrived she didn’t expect it to be one of the top bars in the city but she was delighted to see that it is. The booths looked comfortable around the sides of the bars and there were some tables scattered around the bar as well as chair at the bar. There was a small dance floor for those who wanted to bust a move. It was amazing. She was so glad that Anya had the guts to chase their shared dream.

“Hey Anya I’m here.” Lexa called.

Anya popped her head round the corner before saying, “About time I thought you’d gotten lost.”

“As if I could get lost round this city.”

“Clarke will be here in a second hopefully to show you the ropes.” Anya said tiredly.

“How come you can’t do it?” Lexa questioned. She didn’t mind that Clarke would be helping her as the women seemed easy to get along with.

“I’ve got the fun job of paperwork.” Anya said going back into the office.

“Guess I’ll just wait here.” Lexa said sitting down on a chair.

After about ten minutes she was worried about whether or not Clarke would be there soon.

“Sorry I’m late I got caught up doing something.” Clarke said rushing into the bar nearly tripping on a stool on her way to Lexa.

“Nah its cool,” Lexa said chuckling, “I can tell you’ve been painting.”

“Oh er yeah I was how did you know?” Clarke asked surprised. Unless the brunette had spied on her she had no way of knowing.

“You have some paint on your face.” Lexa said pointing at the paint on Clarke’s cheek.

“Aw crap gimmie a minuet let me just go wash this off.” Clarke said blushing before walking off to the bathroom.

Lexa smiled at Clarke’s forgetfulness. Clarke was wearing tight black skinny jeans as well as a black top that showed off her figure. Finding herself checking Clarke out as she watched her walk to the bathroom Lexa looked away blushing slightly. The blonde was gorgeous and probably very straight. Lexa knew it was bad to make assumptions about people especially their sexualities but she couldn’t stop herself from making it. Anyway she wasn’t looking for a relationship. Not after the last time. Never again would she be fooled. She had just arrived back so she wanted to adjust to life in the city again.   

“Sorry bout that.” Clarke said stopping Lexa’s thoughts, “Lets see what you can do.”

Lexa followed Clarke to the bar and listened to Clarke carefully as she explained where everything was kept. She then asked Lexa to show her some of the drinks she could do which impressed Clarke because she was almost as good as her.

“Nice Lexa I look forward to working with you this evening.” Clarke said truthfully.

The two had some time before the bar opened so they decided to sit at a booth and get to know each other.

“Lexa can I ask you something?” Clarke said nervously.

“Sure.” Lexa replied just as nervous because she didn’t want to talk about her past just yet.

“You’ll need somewhere to stay soon.”

Lexa nodded.

“I have a spare room since my old roommate left without paying their share of the rent a few months ago so if you’d like you could move in with me.”

“Seriously!” Lexa said shocked.

“Yeah seriously.” Clarke said smiling at Lexa’s adorableness.

“I’d love to move in with you.” Lexa said beaming.

Since Lexa just had a suitcase they decided that moving in straight away would be the best thing to do. So at midday tomorrow Lexa would be taking her suitcase of belongings and move in with Clarke.

Halfway through their first shift together Clarke realised that she hadn’t stopped smiling the entire time she’d been working. Perhaps that was why she had gotten so many tips this evening. She and Lexa worked perfectly together knowing exactly what the other needed without wasting time. Finn was a lazy worker only looking for a hook-up at the end of the night but Lexa was a hard worker.

Of course the rest of the shift wouldn’t go without a problem Clarke thought to herself as she saw Finn walk into the bar and straight to her.

“See I’ve been replaced already.” Finn spat out angrily clenching his fists.

“You need to leave now.” Clarke said shaking slightly.

“Why I’m a paying customer.” Finn said smirking, “Now how about you pour me a drink on the house of course for old times’ sake.”

“I’m not going to tell you again Finn. Leave now.” Clarke said while trying to see where Lexa was but was disappointed to see Lexa serving a customer.

“And if I say no.” Finn said leaning forward.

“Then I’ll remove you myself.” Lexa said hearing enough of the conversation to know that this guy was trouble.

“You couldn’t lay a finger on me pretty girl.” Finn said in a threatening manner as he smashed a bottle of beer from the guy next to him.

“Shit.” Lexa said pulling Clarke behind her. She didn’t know why she wanted to protect Clarke so much but right now she didn’t care as to why. Instead she focused on the task at hand. Removing Finn from the bar.

Lexa watched in vain as Finn jumped over the bar so he could get close to the two girls.

“I know you told Anya Clarke.” Finn said as he slowly got closer to Lexa.

Deciding quicker that it was better to rush Finn than let him make the first move Lexa ran straight towards the wavy haired guy punching him in the face. It hurt her hand but Lexa had to focus on Finn who was waving the broken bottle dangerously near her. Around the bar she heard people calling for help which distracted her enough for Finn to cut her.

“Fuck.” Lexa said as the glass cut her arm deeply.

Just as Finn was about to hurt her again he fell forward in pain. Behind Finn stood Anya holding a bottle. As Finn held his head, Anya called the cops immediately using the phone behind the bar so that he could be arrested.

Lexa looked down at her arm watching the blood pour out.

“Shit Lexa you need stiches.” Clarke said worried,” C’mon I’ll take you in my car it’ll be quicker in than an ambulance.

Clarke didn’t know why Lexa pushed her behind her which made her feel guilty that her new friend was hurt.

“But I’ll need to make a statement with the police.”

“Lexa you need to get this sorted.” Clarke said pointing at Lexa’s arm that continued to bleed. Clarke grabbed some clothes and wrapped it round Lexa’s arm before leading her to the car.

 

On the way to the hospital the two sat in silence. Lexa could see how hard Clarke was gripping the steering wheel and was worried about how the night had affected her. Lexa was concerned for Clarke. For some reason she felt like she had to protect Clarke no matter the consequences.

“Are you alright Clarke?” Lexa asked quietly.

“I should be asking you that I mean you’re the one that’s hurt.” Clarke said while keeping her eyes on the road. She wanted to look at Lexa but she didn’t want to cause an accident because she was distracted.

“I may be physically hurt but Finn must have scared you Clarke and that’s much worse than a flesh wound.”  Lexa said honestly.

“I’m fine just worried about you.” Clarke said quickly glancing at Lexa who was looking at her before turning back towards the road,” You didn’t have to push me behind you I could have handle him.”

“Clarke I just felt the need to protect you I’d do it for any of my friends. I don’t want anyone else to die.” Lexa said shaking. She felt trapped after sharing just that little bit too much but thankfully for her they’d arrived at the hospital.

Lexa followed Clarke into the hospital hating every moment of it. For her hospitals were full of memories of death and despair.  Lexa didn’t listen to Clarke talking to the receptionist and was practically dragged by Clarke into the hospital. They walked down the cold corridor for a few minutes before walking into an empty office.

Before Lexa could ask Clarke why they were in an office and not in the waiting room an older women walked in that Lexa recognized.  Not wanting to show any recognition Lexa adverted her eyes from the women.  Lexa was shocked to see Abby again.

“Mum this is Lexa could you stitch her up.” Clarke said standing as her mum walked into the room.

“Sure Clarke could you do a favour and get so coffees?” Abby asked while walking over to Lexa.

“Yeah I’ll be back soon Lexa.” Clarke said walking towards the door but stopping when she opened it halfway,” Thank mum.” She said before finally leaving the room.

“So what did you do this time Lexa?” Abby said breaking the silence as she got to work on Lexa’s arm.

“I was protecting Clarke from a madman and got hurt in the process.” Lexa said watching Abby stitch her arm she was surprised that she was Clarkes mum. Not only was she the person who saved her life but she was also Clarke's mum.

Abby nodded knowing that Lexa would rather protect other people than protect herself.

“Thank you for protecting my daughter but why was there someone after her? How did you meet her?” Abby asked concerned. The last time Abby had seen Lexa was when she was working at another hospital in the town a few miles away. It was sometime last year when Lexa was brought in with stab wounds. Lexa almost died but Abby managed to save her. As soon as Lexa was discharged she had someone bring flowers for Abby as a thank you. She didn't tell Abby anything other than what happened that night so she was surprised that it was enough for the older women to remember who she was. 

“I came back a few days ago. I’ve been staying at my brother Lincolns but Clarke said that I could move in with her.” Lexa said filling Abby in,” The guy Finn who came after Clarke was mad that she told Anya that Finn was the one stealing from the bar.”

“So you haven’t known Clarke for very long and you put yourself in danger for her?” Abby questioned.

“No I haven’t known her long but she’s already been a great friend for me.” Lexa said as Abby finished up on her arm.

Clarke came into the office carrying coffees for everyone not knowing that the two knew each other.

“I got a text from Anya saying that we need to go down to the station after we’re done here.”

“Well I’m all done so you girls be careful now.” Abby said to both of them but mainly towards Lexa. 

 

At the station the two gave individual statements for the officers. It took a long time Clarke suggested that Lexa just stays over that night and then in the morning they can pop round to Lincolns to get Lexa’s belongings. Lexa agreed to this straight away happy to be around someone so thoughtful.

When Lexa walked into the living room of the apartment she immediately saw the painting that Clarke did earlier.  It captured her attention so much that she found herself wandering over to it so she could get a closer look at the masterpiece.

Clarke watched Lexa look at her painting so she walked over to Lexa and stood behind her so they could both look at it.

“So this is why you had paint on your face earlier.” Lexa chuckled.

“Yeah I painted it this morning. “Clarke said nervously waiting for Lexa’s opinion of it.

“It’s beautiful.” Lexa whispered. 

“Thank you.” Clarke said smiling brightly, “I’ll go get you some sleep clothes. Make yourself at home.”

Lexa nodded and continued to stare at the painting before finally settling down on the sofa.  She loved everything about it.

The two talked way into the night before saying good night. It was easy for the both of them with the conversation flowing easily. By the end of the night they both felt happy and free.

When Clarke fell asleep she dreamt of forests and anything green.

When Lexa fell asleep she dreamt of the bluest sky imaginable.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this let me know what you think :)
> 
> Next chapter Lexa officially moves in and the girls receive some bad news.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to do I had some parties that left me incapable to write and then I went camping on the Downs and I also managed to go to Brighton Pride which was amazing.
> 
> Hopefully you enjoy this and the next one should be out soon :)
> 
> Don't forget to comment about what you think :)

Lexa woke early as she had never been one for waking up late. Anya had texted her late last night to let her know that she and Clarke could have the evening off from work after the events of the previous night. Although Lexa would enjoy a night off working would help keep her mind off things plus she wanted to get into a steady routine of going to work.  After a few years of staying in a job for no more than a couple of months at most she wanted to escape that trend. Also when she was stable enough she would be able to properly talk to Lincoln and Anya about everything.

The police promised them both that they would be in touch with anything concerning Finn. Lexa hoped that justice would be served quickly so that this didn’t have to drag out.

Hearing her phone vibrate on the bedside table next to her, Lexa grabbed her phone to check to see if it was important.

 **Anya:** You sure that you’re up for work later?

**Lexa:** Yeah I’m sure, I’ll see you later

Since her shift wasn’t till later she still had most of the day to herself which was great because she still had to pick up her single suitcase of belongings from Lincolns. As it was nearing 8am Lexa went into the kitchen to make a pot of coffee to wake herself up more.

Lexa sat on the dining room table texting Lincoln about her picking the suitcase up.

 **Lincoln:** Hang on O just said that she can pop round and drop it off for you Lex

**Lexa:** Ok great that makes everything easier J

**Lincoln** : You working later?

**Lexa:** Sure am

**Lincoln:** You better sing then

**Lexa:** Wait what????

**Lincoln:** It’s karaoke night

**Lexa:** I am not singing!!

**Lincoln:** I’ll find a way to get you to sing….

 

Just as Lexa finished texting Lincoln Clarke walked into the kitchen with messy hair while yawning.

“Oh thank god there’s coffee.” Clarke said pouring herself a glass.

“Yeah I made some earlier.”

Clarke jumped up almost spilling her drink not having noticed Lexa was sitting in the room drinking coffee.

“Shit sorry.” Lexa said quickly trying not to laugh.

Clarke turned with her hand on her chest, “I see you laughing” She said pointing her finger at Lexa dramatically.

“What me?” Lexa said looking around pretending to look for someone else around her.

“Yeah you green eyes.” Clarke said sipping her coffee carefully trying not to burn her tongue. She hated it when that happens.

“Well blue eyes I guess I’ll have to make breakfast to make up for scaring you.” Lexa said riding from her seat.

“Oh make pancakes.” Clarke said exited.

“Alright pancakes it is.” Lexa chuckled softly finding the ingredients in various places.

As Lexa made her and Clarke pancakes Octavia had quickly dropped off Lexa’s suitcase.

“Hey Lexa I see you’ve already starting cooking for Princess.”

“Princess?” Lexa asked while flipping a pancake.

“Oh god here we go…”Clarke moaned.

“Basically our school had a costume competition and Clarke here came to school in a pink dress and a golden tiara. “ Octavia said as Clarke buried her face in her hands.

“Aww that’s so cute Clarke.” Lexa said plating up Clarkes pancakes before starting her own, “bet you were the best kid there.”

“Yeah that’s the thing we were fifteen.” Octavia laughed.

“Why do you have to tell everyone. “Clarke said diving into her pancakes moaning at the taste of them, “By the way Lex you’re making these every day.”

“Alright Princess.” Lexa said sitting down with her meal.

“Right well I better get to work you know save some peeps.” Octavia shouted as she made her way out of the apartment leaving Lexa alone again with Clarke.

“What does Octavia do for a living?” Lexa questioned.

“She’s a police officer.”

“Oh before I forget are you working later or do you want it off?” Lexa asked. Lexa secretly hoped that Clarke would work so that she wasn’t left with bartenders that she hadn’t met before. She was alright with new people but it took her a few meetings to warm up to a person which is why it’s surprising for her that she warmed up to Clarke instantly.

“I’ll work I hate missing karaoke night.”

 

The two chatted for a while longer before doing the washing up. Lexa washed and Clarke dried. They even sang along to the radio together enjoying the company even while doing such a mundane job. Clarke found out that Lexa had never seen Orange is the new black so once they had finished the washing up Clarke got her Netflix up so they could watch it together.  Clarke hadn’t gotten round to watching season four yet but she was sure that she would end up watching it with Lexa if she enjoyed it.

Lexa was immediately into the programme after one episode so the two spent the day watching as much as they could before they had to get ready for work. After a couple of episode Clarke pulled out her sketchbook finding herself filled with inspiration again to draw. Not really noticing what she was drawing she was surprised after a little while that she was drawing Lexa. Lexa had noticed that Clarke was drawing and the fact that Clarke looked at her occasionally but she was too invested in the show to mind.

A couple hours before they had to leave for work they took turns in the bathroom to get ready. Clarke made the pair some pasta for dinner which Lexa found delicious and promised that she would make dinner next to return the favour. While they ate dinner they sat and watched the news catching up on everything that was happening in the world. Apparently there was some kind of virus going around making people seriously sick. No one had died yet but it was still worrying especially as it was across America and in a few places in Europe.  

Clarke enjoyed having Lexa live with her. Usually she would be alone during the days since her friends work during the day and she works at night. At least now she had Lexa with her. Obviously Clarke was beyond curious as to why exactly Lexa left. All she knew from the bits of information that Lincoln or Anya told her was that Lexa was overwhelmed by everything and just left to escape it all. Clarke could understand that life could get suffocating at times. In fact or more than one occasion Clarke herself wanted to just skip town and start again somewhere else.  But she hadn’t because she just couldn’t leave her family no matter how much they can annoy her so for Lexa to leave everyone behind it must have been for a reason and not a light decision.

“Hey Clarke you’re awfully quiet you doing ok?” Lexa asked concerned about Clarke. Clarke had been quiet the entire journey to work. After last night’s events she was worried that Clarke wasn’t up to working.

“Yeah yeah I’m fine Lex honestly.” Clarke smiled at Lexa.

“You sure?” Lexa hesitantly asked.

“Definitely,” Clarke nudged Lexa’s shoulder softly, “Now come on those pints aren’t gonna pull themselves.”

Just before they reached the bar Lexa received a phone call. Clarke couldn’t hear what was going on but from Lexa’s face she knew that it wasn’t going to be good news.

Once Lexa was off the phone she told Clarke that she would tell her once they get to the bar.

The two reached Grounder’s within a couple of minutes and as soon as they were inside the bar Clarke questioned Lexa about the mysterious phone call.

“Finn’s escaped.” Lexa spat out angrily not at Clarke but at the Police’s incompetence.

“What!?” Clarke said shocked. If Finn had escaped she and Lexa could very well be in danger.  He could come back and cause all kinds of chaos.

“He-he somehow got up there was a mix up or something and they let him go by mistake.” Lexa was stressed by everything but she needed to be there for Clarke.

“Well fuck.” Clarke went up to the bar and started prepping for the night. Working would help keep her distracted.

Lexa walked over to the bar and placed her hand on Clarke’s shoulder as an attempt to comfort the blonde,”Hey you don’t need to work.”

Clarke relaxed into Lexa and sighed, “I know I don’t but it’ll help keep my mind off things plus I love karaoke night.”

Lexa let go of Clarke and started helping her set everything up.

When the bar opened Lexa was surprised that so many people were there already apparently this night was a big deal. Clarke jumped over the bar and ran up to the makeshift stage and spoke into the microphone, “So as you regulars know this is karaoke night were you have to sing a random song! And now to start the night I’ll be singing…” Clarke waited a moment for the small screen on the floor to get the lyrics up for the song, “Well looks like I’m singing some classic Katy Perry here guys.”

The intro started and the lyrics came onto the screen but Clarke didn’t need the lyrics as she knew the song (she might have sung it in the shower once or twice).

 

“You think I'm pretty

Without any makeup on

You think I'm funny

When I tell the punchline wrong

I know you get me

So I let my walls come down, down”

 

Lexa was shocked by Clarke’s voice and found herself watching the blonde intensely. Throughout the entire song Lexa kept her eyes on Clarke. What she didn’t know was that Clarke’s eyes often wandered over to Lexa during the song. The two were drawn to each other in an unnatural way but at the same time it felt completely natural. Before she could compliment Clarke a customer called her over.

While Lexa was pouring the guys drink she noticed that someone else was now on stage singing a fairly decent version of a Green Day song.  As long as no one sang Frozen it would be a good night.

Clarke climbed back over to behind the bar to help out Lexa again knowing that Anya would be out in a minute to keep an eye on the karaoke. 

Overall the night was fun and full of plenty of classic songs both being slaughter in both good and bad ways. Lexa could see why Clarke didn’t want to take the night off. Seeing Clarke happy and free of worry brought a smile Lexa’s face. Even through Finn was out there somewhere she was glad that he wasn’t stopping Clarke from living her life. Lexa actually hoped that she worked every karaoke night as it was so much fun.  

Lincoln, Octavia and Raven turned up to the bar at about 8pm. They all sang a song (some did better than others).  Raven wasn’t the best singer but she could get a crowd going.

Later into the night Anya got on stage and grabbed the mic,”So as some of you may have noticed we have a new bartender.” Some people happily waved their drinks drunkenly into the air,” This means that she gets to sing a little song.” Anya smirked at Lexa before gesturing for her to come on the stage.

Lexa looked around with a panicked look on her face. Noticing Lexa’s panic Clarke walked over to Lexa and whispered,” If you need me I’m here.” Lexa nodded and walked up onto the stage hoping she gets a song she knows.

Anya passed the mic over to Lexa before randomly selecting a song.

“See told you I’d find a way!” Lincoln called from the crowd earning himself a high five from his friends around him. Or their friends. Could Lexa now consider them her friends? Lexa certainly hoped so.

When Lexa heard the intro she smiled into the crowd. She loved this song and had covered it previously at school concerts many a time. Lexa searched for Clarke’s face in the crowd knowing that it’s easier to sing to someone you know than a stranger. Many people would disagree and say it’s the opposite but that’s how it’s always worked for her.

Blue and green locked together and everything fell into place.

Something in the way she moves

Attracts me like no other lover

Something in the way she woos me

 

I don't want to leave her now

You know I believe and how

 

Somewhere in her smile she knows

That I don't need no other lover

Something in her style that shows me

 

Don't want to leave her now

You know I believe and how

 

You're asking me will my love grow

I don't know, I don't know

You stick around now it may show

I don't know, I don't know

 

Something in the way she knows

And all I have to do is think of her

Something in the things she shows me

 

Don't want to leave her now

You know I believe and how

 

As soon as she finished Lexa put the mic back on the stand and walked to the bar trying to ignore the attention on her.

Clarke was pleasantly surprised that Lexa could sing and sing well. The entire song she found herself not being able to look away from Lexa. From the beginning of the two meeting they were drawn together but that shouldn’t be normal after only knowing someone for such a short amount of time. Should it? The two were friends and for now that would be enough.

It had to be.

Lexa went back around into the bar and got back to work trying to hide her red face from Clarke.

“Nicely done Lex didn’t know you had it in you.” Clarke flirted. She didn’t mean to flirt but it came naturally out of her. 

“Thanks.” Lexa nervously replied,” You weren’t too bad yourself.”

Before Clarke could respond their friends had walked up to the bar to congratulate Lexa.

“Well fuck me Woods,”

“Nice one sis,”

“Never thought you had it in you.”

“You do realise that you’re gonna have to do this every week now?” Octavia asked.

They were all impressed by the brunette, Lincoln knew that she could sing but hadn’t heard her in so long that it brought a tear to his eye. He was so happy that she had come home.

“Aw Linc don’t’ cry.” Lexa softly spoke, “I’m here.”

Clarke saw that Lexa had to cheer Lincoln up a bit so she quickly dealt with the customers around.

“I know sorry just hearing you sing again after all these years.”

“Guess I’m gonna have to this every week then.” Lexa suggested.

“Oh yay we so have to get you and Clarke to sing together.” Raven squealed in excitement.

“Yeah I suppose we could…”

By the end of the night Lexa was shattered. Work was busy that night but she enjoyed every minute of it. Coming back was the best decision she made.  After her almost dying last year she’d been close to coming back. She was still trying to get over the fact that Abby is Clarke’s mum. It made Lexa happier thinking that there was a reason for her surviving that night. Maybe it was to fall into Clarke’s life.  She didn’t want to hide the truth so she decided to open up to Clarke about that night last year.

Once home Lexa asked Clarke to sit on the sofa so she could talk to her. It was late and they were tired but she needed to talk to someone.

“Hey you alright Lex?” Clarke was worried. Lexa was nervous the entire walk home and now she asked her to sit down so they could talk. Whatever it was about it would be serious.

“Yeah I just need to tell you something.”

“Ok go ahead.”

“Last year your mum saved my life.” Lexa looked into Clarke’s eyes looking for something,” I was on the streets and I got into a fight which ended up with me being stabbed.” Lexa lifted up her top so Clarke could see the long scar that went across her stomach.

Clarke traced the scar with the tips of her fingers, “My mum saved you?” Clarke wasn’t quite sure if she heard Lexa right,”Fuck Lexa you almost died.”

“Yes but your mum saved me I-I just seeing her the other night brought it back and I needed to talk to someone.” Lexa if possible looked even deeper in Clarke’s eyes. She was lost in the ocean, “I needed to talk to you.”

Clarke hugged Lexa tightly not wanting to let go.

“After I was able to leave the hospital I went back I sent her some flowers as a thank you.”

“I remember her saying that one of her patients sent her some of the most beautiful carnations she’d ever received.” Clarke pulled back slightly so that she could see Lexa again.

“She saved my life it was the least I could do.” Lexa yawned, “Sorry guess we better sleep now.” She chuckled still in Clarke’s arms.

Clarke took her arms away from Lexa,”I’m here if you ever need me Lex.”

And Lexa knew that Clarke was telling the truth.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay another chapter done! This was easier to write than some of the others but took longer for me to complete because I got my As result for law today which I failed. It sucks because I worked my ass of all year for a disappointing grade but I can't change anything so I just have to move on and focus on getting ready to go back in September. 
> 
> Anyway I hope you enjoy this. There are mentions of death in this chapter btw. Oh and sorry for any mistakes it's currently 2am and I haven't slept for a while

Lexa always liked having a routine: get up, go for a run, eat breakfast and do whatever needed doing that day.

On this particular day she did want to get back into running. In high school she ran cross country. It was a tiring but rewarding event. She got up early (6am) grabbed her gear from the suitcase that she still needs to unpack and left closing the door quietly so she didn’t wake Clarke. 

Lexa hated running through the streets. It was smelly and could be boring depending on the route. She much preferred the crisp air of the country side that’s free from smog.  Luckily for her Clarke lived near the cities big park that had a massive lake that you could run around. It was wonderful, since it was spring there were colourful flowers planted neatly in various places across the park. Lexa ran up a hill opposite the lake as she was curious to see the view from the top. She wasn’t disappointed. As soon as she reached the top she could see the city for miles. If she came here at sunrise the view would be even more magical.

After her run instead of returning to the flat straight away she quickly popped into a flower shop that she noticed was setting up on the way to her run. Inside the shop was a burst of colour everywhere she looked. Every colour across the rainbow and beyond could be seen. It was overwhelming to Lexa because it meant she didn’t know what to buy Clarke.  Lexa loved flowers almost as much as she loved candles but she didn’t know which ones were perfect for her roommate.

The flowers were meant to be a thank you for everything that the blonde beauty had done for her. Though they had only known each other for a few days there was an undeniable connection between the two of them.  Conversation was easy. They could tease one another but have a serious conversation at the same time.

The women behind the counter noticed that Lexa was struggling so came over to help her. The two looked at various combinations. Lexa ended up choosing a bouquet of lilies. After paying and thanking the lady for her help Lexa headed back to the flat. When she gets in she’d put the flowers in the empty vase that she noticed sat in the corner and then she would take a shower.

It was good that Clarke’s last roommate left their key when they left as it meant Clarke didn’t have to get another cut for her which would be irritating to do.

Lexa arrived back to the flat to find Clarke laying down on the sofa with her sketchbook. Lexa didn’t expect her to be up yet as it was still early in the morning and she knew how much Clarke liked her sleep. It wasn’t that Clarke was lazy it was that she didn’t sleep very well therefore needed to lie in most mornings to catch up.

Although Lexa was all sweaty from her run she went over to Clarke worried that something was wrong.

“Hey Clarke I got you these.” Lexa lifted the flowers up slightly.

Clarke looked up from her sketchbook smiling immediately at the sight in front of her. She hadn’t noticed Lexa coming in and was surprised to see Lexa in next to no clothing waving some gorgeous flowers in the air that she desperately wanted to get up and look at properly.

Clarke put down her sketchbook on the coffee table next to her and sat on the sofa still facing Lexa but with her feet on the ground instead. “Thanks Lex but why did you get them?”

Lexa walked over to Clarke handing the flowers over to the blonde. Clarke loved the lilies and their scent. “I got them to say thank you for everything. You gave me a home again.” Everything Lexa told Clarke was true and came straight from the heart. She hadn’t been able to connect to someone this quickly since Costia and that both scared her and made her want to run away but at the same time it made her feel better. Like she was finally getting better.

Clarke was overwhelmed. So overwhelmed that she was speechless. She didn’t know how to respond to Lexa so she placed the flowers carefully on the coffee table, rose from the sofa and embraced Lexa in a hug no caring that the brunette had just come back from a run. “There is no need to thank me Lex.” Clarke moved away from Lexa.” Why don’t you go take a shower and I’ll make us some pancakes for breakfast and put these beauties in water.”  

Lexa nodded and walked over to the bathroom to shower realising that her feelings for Clarke could be more than platonic. Lexa didn’t know if Clarke was even into girls but she secretly hoped she was. She wouldn’t do anything yet. The friendship between them was more important and right now she had too many things to sort out and a relationship would complicate everything.  Lexa decided that she would have to talk to her brother and best friend soon. It needed to be done. Although she didn’t feel completely ready to it she knew that logically she would never be one hundred percent ready. It would be difficult to relive the past however sometimes you needed to so that you could move on.

After her shower she got dressed in some simple sweatpants and tank top. Ready for her breakfast with Clarke she wandered into the kitchen to sit at the dining table to eat breakfast with her friend/roommate.

“So how come you’re up so early?” Lexa wondered out loud.

“I er had a nightmare actually.” Clarke looked away embarrassed.

Lexa could tell that Clarke thought it was something that she should feel embarrassed about because she saw Clarke lower her gaze away from her. Lexa stopped eating for a moment and placed her hand on Clarke’s arm, “Clarke it’s nothing to feel embarrassed about. I too have nightmares about a number of things.”

“You do?” Questioned Clarke looking back up at the brunette.

Lexa removed her hand from Clarke took a deep breath and then spoke softly to Clarke, “I’ve had the same nightmare for the last three years so I know what it’s like to have them.”

Clarke didn’t want to push Lexa but she had a question burning up inside of her that she needed to get out.  “What’s it about?” Clarke hesitantly asked.

Lexa’s appetite was but gone so she pushed the plate away slightly. The sight of food was making her nauseas.

Clarke saw Lexa’s hesitation and decided to try and take back her question scared that she would make Lexa run off again, “You-you don’t have to tell me if you’re not ready.”

Lexa shook her head slightly, “No its ok I’ll tell you. It’s just that I haven’t spoken to anyone about this.”

They sat in silence for a few moments both forgetting about the food sat in front of them.

“Three years ago I was the happiest I’d ever been. I was in love and everything was perfect or at least I thought it was. I haven’t told anyone this but I was planning to propose to Costia. I’d spent months saving for a ring.” Lexa took a deep breath before continuing,” After a busy shift at work I came home to find her-her with the person who tormented me for years in high school.” Tears flowed down Lexa’s face, “I’m sorry I don’t think I can do this yet.” Lexa said running into her room closing the door behind her before curling up on the bed crying her eyes out.

“Fuck.” Clarke got up quickly from the chair and followed Lexa to her room. Once she got to her room she knocked quietly. When she got no response other than the crying that she heard in the room she opened the door slowly in case Lexa asked her to leave.  Clarke walked into the room finding Lexa curled up into a ball with her face deep into the pillow, “Lex I’m so sorry for pushing you.”

Lexa sat up on the bed and motioned for Clarke to climb on the bed next to her.

When Clarke was on the bed she started fiddling with the hands due to the nerves so Lexa covered them with her own, “You didn’t push me I wanted to tell you I still want to tell you I just panicked and ran like I always do. I need to get this out and-and I know that I can trust you.” Lexa didn’t want to run any more but she couldn’t help turning back to old habits.

“I-I trust you as well Lex.” Clarke said resting her head on Lexa’s shoulder.

“When my dad died the first thing I did was run to a bar so I could get smashed. I ended up getting so drunk that I woke up in hospital the next day. I still don’t completely remember everything that night but the next day when I woke up I heard my mum crying over me. It’s something I regret every day. The point is sometimes we do stupid things that we wish we could take back that we just can so the only thing we can do is spend the rest of our life living it to the fullest and by moving on in a healthy way.  Clarke looked up at Lexa and wiped a few tears from her face that she saw running down her cheek.

Lexa pulled Clarke into a tight hug wanting to feel close to her. The blonde always seemed to calm her down.  Clarke had broken down the walls she built up in just days and they took years to be fully built so that no one could get in. Not even her best friend and brother had managed to do that yet and she’d known them her entire life.

“After I found her with Nia.” Clarke looked up slightly so that Lexa knew she was there and was listening to her closely,” Nia practically ran out of the apartment but not before giving that evil smirk she always carried round with her. Costia was saying that it was a onetime thing but I wouldn’t listen to her. I was heartbroken so I kicked her out of the apartment. The next day I got a call from Lincoln telling me that our parents were both in hospital but I was too late by the time I got there they were both gone.  I already felt broken but that just destroyed me.” Lexa was crying again so Clarke wiped some of the tears away with her thumb and held Lexa tighter,” Costia, Lincoln just everyone kept calling me and not giving me any space. Costia kept trying to say sorry but I told her we were done and she wouldn’t accept it. She got mugged on the way to mine one evening. If I had met her, forgiven her she wouldn’t be dead. She wouldn’t have left in the middle of the night to talk things through with me. That’s why I left I was bad for everyone I brought nothing but pain and misery to people’s lives.” Lexa looked at Clarke and then elaborated more,” I started going out to bars and clubs to get smashed resulting in Lincoln or Anya to come pick me up. I left so they could live their lives properly so that they didn’t have to look after me. I was uncontrollable and unreasonable. I don’t know if they could ever fully forgive me,” Lexa whispered the last part so quietly Clarke almost didn’t hear it, “I wouldn’t forgive me.”

“Lexa listen to me none of that and I mean none of it was your fault. She cheated on you and nobody deserves that ok. You had so many shit things happen at the same time no one can blame you running away and taking a breather. They already forgave you long ago they just need time to adjust.”

“I was gone for three years though surely I should’ve come back sooner.” Lexa argued.

“You needed to take as much time as you needed. We all deal with pain in different ways. Mine was alcohol for a while before I threw myself into work. You just needed time away. ”

“How can you be so amazing?” Lexa asked. Clarke had made her feel better and a little less broken in such a short amount of time.

“I’m not I’m just being truthful.” Clarke smiled at Lexa.

“I’m sorry you lost you dad.”

“I’m sorry you lost your parents.” Clarke knew that Lexa’s parents weren’t alive because Lincoln had told her but she didn’t know about Costia.

Lexa was exhausted the conversation had completely drained her of all of her energy. Clarke was still tired from her lack of sleep due to the nightmare she had. The two fell asleep in each other’s arms sleeping peacefully for the first time in years.

 

Around midday they woke to someone loudly knocking on the apartment’s door. Lexa felt Clarke wrapped around her. The last time she slept with someone else was Costia so this was strange for her. Although it was strange she liked the feeling of someone beside her. It made her feel less alone.

“I’ll go get the door Clarke.” Lexa said rising from the bed slowly as the knocking continued.

Lexa was just about ready to punch whoever was knocking but she found her anger to disappear when she opened the door to find Octavia and Raven. As soon as the door was opened they pushed past Lexa so they could settle themselves on the sofa.

Raven started pulling food out of one bag while Octavia started pulling drink out of another.

“Lexa go grab Clarke and we can get this girls day started.” Raven said excitedly while she set up the Xbox.

“Oh um yeah right I’ll just grab her.” Lexa said flustered.

Lexa walked back into her room to find Clarke hugging the pillow that Lexa had been using. The sight in front of her was so adorable and yet she didn’t feel guilty as she woke the blonde up from her nap.

“Guys not being rude but why are you here?” Clarke asked confused.

“Well since Lexa here is new to the squad we decided a girl’s day would be a great way to get to know her.” Octavia spoke up as Raven made sure all of the controllers had batteries in them.

Clarke was happy that her friends thought of this idea. It would help Lexa feel included and wanted which she was previous to this but Lexa could now see that people wanted her around.

“Anya wanted to be here but she has to work. “Raven informed the group as she read a message from her phone.

“And she couldn’t text me because…?” Lexa said.

“I don’t know why you two haven’t just banged already.” Clarke smirked.

“Because if I tell her I like her she’ll reject me ok.” Raven said frustrated.

“Yeah Arya Stark isn’t the best character on Game of Thrones.” Octavia laughed.

“Hang on let me get this straight.” Lexa started.

“Nothing straight about it dear Lex.” Clarke said from beside the brunette on the sofa that they occupied.

Lexa chuckled slightly at Clarke’s comment before carrying on, “So you have a crush on my best friend Raven?” Lexa asked, “And your worried Anya doesn’t feel the same way?”

“Yeah pretty much.” Octavia said.

“If you do ask her out which I think you should take her to see suicide squad she’d never say no to Harley quinn.” Lexa wanted to help Anya get away from work and Raven seemed like a great person for her.

“I’ll think about it. Anyway let’s get this started Battlefield four!” Raven said while throwing the controls to everyone.

“Anyone want a drink?” Octavia asked.

“Oh what do you have?”

“Well since its midday...”Raven said.

“Oh god…”Clarke put her face in her hands. The last time she, Raven, Octavia and Anya had a random girls day in the middle of the week they all got a bit too drunk and had the worse ever hangovers when they woke up. All of them were confined to the bathroom for a majority of the day. Clarke shivered at the thought of that day.

“I got us some vodka and coke plus lemonade in case you don’t wanna drink.” Raven shrugged.

“Oh what the hell I’ll vodka and coke Rae,” Octavia said handing Raven her cup.

Lexa and Clarke both grabbed a lemonade wanting to have a few decent games of Battlefield before drinking. Hearing her phone ding Lexa grab it from the coffee table in front of her.

 **Anya:** Lexa could you come down to the bar for a while me and Ontari are completely rushed off our feet apparently there was a football match and Polis won so now loads of people are celebrating

 **Lexa:** Yeah I’ll quickly get dressed. Do you need Clarke or just me?

 **Anya:** Nah let her have the day off she works way to much

 **Lexa:** Wow you’re being surprisingly nice for an asshole

 **Anya:** I like to keep people of their toes now hurry up and get down here!!

“Guys look like I’m gonna have to bail Anya wants me down at the bar.” Lexa said disappointed that she couldn’t spend more time with Clarke and the others but mainly Clarke is she were to be completely honest.

“Oh boooo! You can’t go!” Raven threw a crisp at Lexa’s head causing everyone to burst out laughing as Lexa hit herself in the face trying to deflect the crisp.

“Well that was a fail.” Lexa said getting up from the sofa walking into her room to get changed.

Lexa quickly said goodbye to everyone in the apartment and left for work with a huge grin on her face feeling a bit freer than she had felt in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a shorter chapter but I wanted to get something posted. This won't be abandoned but I haven't had as much time to write recently. I want to just sit down and write but I simply can't. I've got some upcoming meetings with my college to sort out my courses and I'm having to take my mum to hospital appointments. When I do manage to sit down and write it's a huge stress revealer but annoyingly the only time I can write is at stupid times.
> 
> Anyway I hope you enjoy this. Please tell me what you think, honestly it makes me smile every time I see a comment and it reminds me of why I'm doing this. I'm trying to keep this fluffy at the moment since my personal life isn't great right now but I will throw in some angst to keep this interesting.

When Lexa got to the bar she saw Anya and another women with long brown hair working hard serving the sea of customers.  Seeing the two clearing struggling with the demand Lexa quickly got behind the bar and starting helping. For the next couple of hours the three worked hard to keep the customers happy by not making them wait long for drinks. It was difficult but rewarding. For a long time life for Lexa was unsure but now she could see herself staying and having a life with her friends and family. She had a job, new friends and home to go back to.  Of course she wouldn’t want to burden Clarke with her staying an extended amount of time but for now it would work because Clarke wouldn’t be able to afford the place on her own. However one day Clarke would want to move in with her significant other and Lexa would be left wondering where to go next. Right now though she didn’t even know if Clarke was going out with someone. She knew that Clarke was bi and Clarke obviously knew about Lexa since they talked about Costia but Lexa still didn’t know if Clarke was going out with somebody or not. Lexa didn’t want to outright ask as she felt it wasn’t any of her business but she couldn’t help but think about it.

“Hey you doing alright Lexa?” Ontari asked noticing that Lexa had spaced out.

“Yeah I was just thinking.” Lexa poured herself a glass of water.

“Did that hurt?” Anya said as she walked past the two of them.

Lexa sent Anya an unimpressed look, “I’m fine honestly. Thanks for asking.”

Ontari placed her hand on Lexa’s arm for a second before removing it to comfort her, “If you ever need to talk to someone I’m here.”

Lexa laughed nervously,” Yeah alright thanks.” Lexa looked for something to get her out of the conversation. Miraculously a customer came up to the bar for a drink so Lexa took the opportunity to get out on the conversation without looking rude.

Anya informed Lexa that she wanted to talk to her after they closed the bar. Lexa was nervous knowing that the conversation was probably going to be about her disappearance but Lexa wasn’t ready to talk to anyone about it yet. However that wasn’t completely true as she briefly spoke to Clarke about it. The conversation with Clarke had helped as she wasn’t pressured into telling her. It was her choice.

“Hey Lex,” Ontari called as she walked over to her. When Clarke called her Lex she felt special and it was nice but coming from Ontari it felt wrong. Not because she didn’t like Ontari, she did, but because Ontari was a stranger and it didn’t come from someone she cared about. _Wait care about?_ Lexa knew that the possibility to like Clarke as more than a friend was there but she didn’t think it would be this soon. Lexa was too messed up at the moment to even think about relationship plus the fact she hadn’t thought about anyone this way since Costia.

“Hey Ontari.”Lexa replied with a small smile to be polite. Once Ontari realized to back off a bit they could be friends. Not great friends but friends nonetheless. Throughout the entire shift Ontari would try and distract Lexa by meaningless conversation that wasn’t welcome as she was working. When she and Clarke worked together they would get through the shift flawlessly like a well-oiled machine.

“I’m heading off now just thought I’d say bye to you before I go.”Ontari flirted.

“Yeah I guess I’ll see you next shift we work.”Lexa replied wanting this to be over so that she can get the talk with Anya over and done with.

Ontari seemed disappointed with the answers from Lexa so she gave up for the night after saying bye to Anya.

“Hey Anya you wanted to talk,” Lexa said as she walked into Anya’s office. The office was small with plain red walls. Anya’s desk had her laptop on it alongside a few photos in black frames and other things that were thrown on and forgotten about.  A houseplant was in the far corner of the room which was strange as Anya hated houseplants as she found them generally a waste of both money and space.

“Yeah take a seat Lexa.” Lexa nervously sat down and fiddled with her hands feeling like she was sat in the principal’s office. Anya realized that Lexa was nervous so decided to reassure the poor girl,” No need to be so nervous Lexa I’m not going to interrogate you. I just wanted to ask you a couple of things about the business,” Anya clarified.

“Why are you asking me though?” Lexa asked with shock on her face.

“Because believe it or not you’re still my best friend and I trust your judgement.” Anya said truthfully.

Lexa was speechless Anya was being great.

Anya knew that Lexa was too shocked to use words at the moment so she continued,” So I was thinking of getting rid of a couple of the tables to make room for a pool table.”

“Well I’m not just saying this because I love pool but I really think that would be a good investment.”

“You really think so? “Anya questioned.

Lexa chuckled in her seat.

“Why are you laughing at me?” Anya asked annoyed and confused.

“Because you’re the one that’s made a growing business in three years while I’ve been doing whatever.” Lexa shared.  Lexa always had faith in Anya when she told Lexa of her plans to one day run a bar. At a young age Anya used to make everyone lemonade and then charge them once they were done. Even though it was annoying Anya’s parents always gave Anya some money. Looking back it was pretty adorable which meant if she were to tell anyone about this she would be killed by her friend.

Anya nodded,”Alright I’ll order the table glad that’s sorted. What were you doing for money?” Anya asked curious.

Lexa sighed knowing that this was her fault for the question,” I was working in diners in bars pretty much whatever.” The worse job Lexa did was when she had to be a cleaner in a hotel. She almost shivered at the thought of the horrors she dealt with in that disgusting hotel, “Can we not talk about this I-I’m just not ready yet.  I will tell you just not yet.” Lexa told Anya.

“I get that Lex but it’s not healthy to bottle everything up you should talk to someone even if it’s not me or Lincoln,” Anya was worried for her friend. If she didn’t talk about it then Lexa would overthink about it and that wouldn’t be good for anyone as it could lead to Lexa leaving again. Her heart would break if that happened again.

“I’m not bottling it all up I was talking to Clarke about it.”

“I’m glad you have someone to talk to Lexa but I am surprised it’s Clarke.” Anya got up to pour herself a glass of coke from the mini fridge she kept in her office and silently offered Lexa a glass. Lexa didn’t want one so she just poured herself a glass and sat back down.

“She had a nightmare and we kinda just ended up helping each other a bit.” Lexa summed up not wanting to go into detail.

Anya nodded, she knew Clarke had nightmares. Again she was surprised that Clarke had shared with Lexa. Those two were clearing meant to be together. For two people with high unbreakable walls built around them to talk to each other about their problems was a huge deal. She was happy not only for Lexa to talk to someone but for Clarke to as well. Raven and Octavia had both tried on numerous occasions but quickly learned that it only made the blonde shut down even more.

“I’m glad Lexa I really am. Right I’ll let you go you look like you could fall asleep at any moment and I don’t really want to see you drool again.”

The two friends said their goodbyes while trying to hold back yawns. They failed miserably.

 

Clarke was disappointed when Lexa was called into work as she wouldn’t be able to her till a few days as she was working when Lexa wasn’t. _Maybe I should ask Anya if I can swap shifts so that I work with Lexa all the time._ Clarke didn’t want to be clingy so she probably wouldn’t ask even if she desperately wanted to.  Lexa calmed Clarke and made her feel less broken.

Octavia was in the middle of picking the next map for Mario Kart when Lexa came into the apartment.

Lexa wasn’t really shocked to find that the three girls were up knowing from the other night that they could play games for hours without getting bored of each other.

“Hey Lexa,” Clarke said noticing the brunette practically bounce into the room due to excitement, “Do you wanna play I can grab the other remote?”

“You do realise this means none of you aren’t going to win another match?” Lexa said cockily as she sat on the sofa next to Clarke leaving only a small gap between the two of them.

Octavia nudged Raven with her elbow subtly to get the women’s attention. Raven looked at Octavia with her eyebrow raised on one side. Octavia pointed over to Lexa and Clarke so Raven could see how close the two were clearly getting.

“Oh I will find a way to beat you even if I have to team up with these losers,” Clarke said hitting Lexa on the shoulder softly in a teasing manner.

“Yeah we’ll beat you Lexa.” Octavia called over to Lexa joining in the conversation.

“O you basically agreed with Clarke that we’re losers.” Raven shot a dirty look at Clarke before tapping Octavia on the head.

“Ow Raven stop tapping me c’mon dude just get off me.”

Clarke and Lexa looked at each other before breaking a loud laugh.

Raven stopped and stared at Octavia.

“Ok why are you staring at me miss creepy.” Octavia shuffled away from Raven not liking the look she was receiving.

“You said dude. “Raven said joining in Clarke’s and Lexa’s laughter. Soon Octavia joined in and the four of them spent the next few minutes trying to stop laughing. It got to the point that it hurt to laugh and every little thing cracked them up. It didn’t help that they were pulling funny/scary faces at each other.

Eventually they calmed down enough to get the game set up. As soon as the first race began the room went completely silent. Everyone was concentrating hard on beating each other.

Lexa tended to move as she played the game so every now and again her leg would touch Clarke’s. Had Octavia or Raven noticed this they would have teased the pair.

They decided to start of easily with the classic Mushroom Cup. Lexa came first in all four maps with Clarke coming in a close second and Raven and Octavia coming either third or fourth.

“Boom told you I’d win.” Lexa said smirking at everyone.

“Hell no I’m not taking this anymore. Let’s play balloon battle.” Raven said dramatically.

“Are you sure last time got pretty tense and by tense there were a few smashed glasses.”

“I’m sure let’s do this.” Raven said setting up the game.

“Yeah let’s do this.” Lexa said with Octavia nodding her head in agreement.

Lexa was slightly worried as she mainly stuck to playing the main game. She wasn’t terrible at the battle rounds but it was her weak spot. She’d have to pull out all of her moves if she were to win this.

Instead of arguing on the map they’d play they chose a random one with it ending up to be Cookie Land which was as it said in the title essentially a giant cookie map.

Half an hour later a various maps played the overall winner was Clarke with Raven in second, Octavia in third and Lexa in last.

“Omg Lex I can’t believe you came forth!” The games were hilarious. Raven, Octavia and Clarke all ganged up on poor Lexa. She never stood a chance.

“You all ganged up on me.” Lexa sulked.

“No you happened to be in front of all of us at the same time.” Raven pointed out.

“That’s because you cornered me!”

“Aww it’s ok Lexa you’ll get us next time.” Clarke poked Lexa.

“Too right I will.”Lexa said poking Clarke back and inadvertently starting a poking war that left the two girls on the floor in compromising positions.

The four hanged out for another hour or so before going to bed late at night. Clarke offered for the two to stay over the night but luckily Lincoln was still up so he picked Octavia and Raven up taking the two home.

 

“How was work? “Clarke asked wanting to spend more time with the green eyed girl.

“Very busy plus I think Ontari was hitting on me.” Lexa said.

Clarke could tell that Lexa was unhappy about Ontari flirting with Lexa but she couldn’t stop herself from asking the next question that she thought of,” Would you have said yes if she asked you two out on a date?”

“No I’m not really ready to date anyone right now I’m screwed up right now.” Although if Lexa was ready to date she could imagine herself dating the blonde in front of her.

Clarke was disappointed that Lexa wasn’t ready to date but she understood,”Yeah I understand.”

The two locked eyes for a moment both overcome with emotions for the other but it was too soon. Far too soon. Neither one knew about the others feelings but if they had they would have thrown themselves at the other.  After they awkwardly looked away they said goodnight and tried to dream of a better future before the nightmares came for them.

 

Clarke was a light sleeper so when she heard a scream from the other room she got up immediately and ran to Lexa’s room.  When she walked into the room she found Lexa huddled up in a ball crying softly.

Carefully Clarke got into bed and opened her arms up so Lexa could fall into them. Lexa fell into Clarke straight away clinging onto the other girl as some sort of life support. Time went by slowly as she held her friend in her arms.

“Thank you.” Lexa whispered so softly that she wasn’t sure if she heard it or not.

“Shh sleep Lex I’ll be here all night if you want me to be.” Clarke kissed the top of her head.

Lexa nodded afraid that her voice would crack and clung onto Clarke a bit tighter but not enough to prevent her from breathing.

The rest of the night was free from nightmares and with less pain but there was still a long way to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This wasn't the best but it's getting pretty late now so I'm going to attempt to sleep
> 
> Thank you for reading x

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading :)


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